I can't come to the phone right now
by VoyagerBorg85
Summary: When Clarke suffers a tragedy and only Lexa and Anya are able to help her get through it. [Oneshot]
**2nd March 2016.**

The familiar voice echoed in its' usual greeting played out in Clarke's ear and she took a deep breath before speaking into the mouthpiece, trying to gather the strength.

" **Hey babe, I know you're busy so this won't take long but I just needed to hear your voice right now. Today's been the hardest day for me and I wish you were there with me. Work was important I know but I could feel you beside me and I just wanted to thank you and I-"**

Phone cuts off the rest of Clarke's message.

 **14th March 2016.**

" **Hey Lexa, I've been trying to call you but work must be really busy to have you swamped, I've not seen you in a few days. I just wanted to say that I love you so much."**

She hangs up this time.

 **16th March 2016.**

" **[Crying is heard] Please, Lexa, just pick up the phone. I don't like feeling like this. [More crying, the flow of tears sound harder this time] I love you so much, I miss you. Work has been taking you away from me."**

She stays on the line until the message cuts off.

 **27th March 2016.**

" **Hey, just thought you might like to know that I got promoted at work, this is something that I've always wanted to do and I know you're busy but wish you were here…. [Heavy sigh] I miss you."**

"I miss you" She spoke into the phone, after she hung up.

 **14th April 2016.**

" **Look, it's been over a month and I'm not sure if I can do this any more, babe please. You need to be here and you're not and it's… taking everything I have not to fall apart here."**

Her thumb swiped to end the call before she could break down in tears, curled into herself as she nuzzled into her haven of what used to be /their/ bed, her eyes red rimmed as she allowed herself to fall into a fitful sleep with dreams of her brave brunette.

 **7th June 2016:**

" **Lexa, you would have loved to have seen this service… you would have been so proud of these people, your people. They said some nice things about you too. They gave me a medal with your name on it. I'm so proud of you… my wife."**

Fingers touched the metal as if it was brittle and would fall apart under her fingers, splashes of tears covering Lexa's name on the mini engraved medal. Turning to the dark blonde who was sitting next to her with concerned eyes. "I'm okay, Anya. It… has been a month and it still fucking hurts."

"She saved me, and I wish she hadn't because it took her away from you." Anya spoke with regret as she pulled in the blonde into her embrace. "Raven was taken away from me too, I do the same you know. I phone Raven every day, just to hear her voice saying that god awful greeting" Anya chuckled a little then it falls from her lips as she looked at Clarke. "I miss her, why did our girls have to be such fucking heros?" Anya ran her fingers through Clarke's hair. Trying to get the memories of that day out of her mind but she had to do this, Clarke needed to hear this, to this day she never even asked what had happened. All she was told that her wife died in a friendly fire trying to save her squad and she had succeeded in saving Anya and four others but she had failed to get herself and Anya's lover out in time. The dark blonde was angry at Lexa and Raven for sacrificing themselves but she couldn't wallow in self pity all her life, not when she could help those in need. With a soft voice, she told the tale, her eyes closing and her mind bringing it up in vivid detail.

 **24th February 2016. [Flashback]**

 _It was blistering hot, sweat dripping off their brows as they fixed their guns onto their shoulders. Lexa peered through the binoculars and searching the horizon for the enemy's approach; they had intel that they were nearby and was planning an attack soon. She couldn't have asked for a better squad than this, she had Anya by her side, Indra, Gustus; her most trusted soldiers, Nyko as the squad's medic but he could certainly hold his own in a firefight and Raven as their engineer, she was needed if things spiralled downhill fast and there were others too but she didn't know them as well but if Anya trusted them then she placed her own in them too. "I see nothing so far, and get your eyes off Reye's backside" She chuckled at the quiet protest coming from the dark blonde's throat._

" _You can talk, when we are back home, you're practically attached to that blonde of yours"_

" _That's different, she's my wife… and has been for the past four years." The brunette smirked at Anya as she dropped down from her lookout to swap with Anya; handing over the binoculars._

" _So is she…" Anya whispered and she didn't dare turn to glance at a shocked Lexa. She and Raven hadn't wanted to reveal to anyone and instead announcing it at their welcome home party that Clarke had no doubt planned for Lexa and the rest of the squad._

" _What? You both….? You do realise that Clarke will kill you both and rage for days on end when she finds out?" Lexa laughed as she could imagine her wife finding out, but she was not looking forward to hearing the rant; when Clarke was pissed off about something, she will not relent. She remembered the time where she had made Clarke a meal, one that included an ingredient, something that she had been allergic to and they both ended up in the ER. That was five years ago and she had never let Lexa forget it._

" _Yeah, we decided to do it before we came out here, it was something that had to be done. It was the right time. We did it the week before we flew out." Being out here took its' toll on them and it had only been a few weeks since Lexa saw Clarke, Anya had it easier since Raven was in the same squad but they had to keep their relationship quiet and not out in the open but they were both private people so it didn't matter too much to them._

" _I'm happy for you, An. She's good for you, I can see that." Lexa patted her comrade's leg comfortingly as she moved forward to ready her gun._

 _Anya suddenly tensed up and made a signal with her hand to Lexa, this was it. The enemy was here and they were going to be ready for them._

 **7th June 2016.**

" **Hey Lexa, it's Clarke and Anya here. We just wanted to tell you together that we love you and miss you so much"**

Clarke placed a kiss against Anya's cheek as she regaled the events that led to Lexa and Raven's deaths, tears streaming down both of their cheeks. "You're here Anya, make the most of it okay?"

She gave Clarke a shaky smile as she hugged her friend even tighter, mourning both of their losses.

 **2nd September 2016.**

" **Hey babe, it's been six months since… yeah and I'm missing you like crazy every day. I need to tell you something, Anya moved in yesterday. Don't worry; we aren't… not like that. She moved in to keep me company and I didn't want to be on my own in this house. She's struggling since Raven… yeah. I just want you to know that I love you."**

It was Clarke that had suggested the move after she had found Anya in a drunken stupor one night at her doorstep, they leant on each other after Anya was the one to break the news to her, Anya was the one who found Clarke in the shower clutching Lexa's shampoo bottle. Clarke had been the one to bring Anya out of the gutter when she couldn't find the strength to stand on her feet. The blonde and the soldier forged a deeper friendship, they had let others think they moved on with each other but the truth was that they would never move on, not from their wives. Lexa and Raven were the only ones for them and that was the way it would remain.

 **2nd March 2017.**

" **Lexa, do you remember the time we got your eggs harvested. Well, I wish you were here so I could see your expression when I tell you that I'm pregnant with your baby. [Laughs softly] I'm carrying your baby, Lexa."**

Clarke grinned brightly into the phone, her senses were overwhelmed with the news, Anya had left the blonde to tell Lexa's phone the news. As odd as it was, this arrangement seemed to have worked out. They were friends, they held each other through the anniversary of their wives' deaths today but the sadness was dulled with the news of the pregnancy and the first person that Clarke thought of was the brunette. She was going to have Lexa's baby…

 **30th November 2017.**

" **It's Clarke here, you have a beautiful son, his name is Alex. He's named after his brave mama. He has green eyes, just like you and a dark head of hair; he's going to be a real heartbreaker when he grows up. I miss you so much and I want you to see our son."**

 **15th August 2022.**

" **Our son just started pre-kindergarten, he was nervous but then he did this little face thing that you do when you cover up how you are really feeling. He really is a mini Lexa. [Laughing] He aced that class, and I know you would be proud of him. I love you."**

 **21st August 2024.**

" **He's grown so big since Kindergarten and today was his first day at first grade, he has your height, your glare and he's just… he reminds me every day of you and my heart hurts because you are not here to watch him grow. He had eyes for a blonde the other day, just like his mama down to a Tee. I love you so much"**

 **25th September 2033.**

" **Alex just started senior high school, he's doing really well in his classes. That is definitely your genes, but he definitely has my game because he just asked one of his friends to one of those dances; his name is Nolan…who is Monty and Nathan's son. Alex looks at him, the way you looked at me. I better go, that's Anya bringing your son home from his date. Love you babe."**

 **28th May 2036.**

" **It's graduation day! He's so smart Lexa that he skipped a few grades and he got a scholarship to Harvard. Our baby is all grown up and going off to Harvard! I'm so proud of him, I swear I saw Anya shedding a tear earlier. She mumbled something about something in her eye but she was crying. I must go and tease her about this. I love you and I miss you more every day."**

 **18th July 2040.**

" **Lexa… I just got told I have bone cancer and I'm not going to make it even two months. Anya and Alex are right here with me. [Quiet hellos coming from the two] I'm okay right now, I'm being looked after. I love you Lexa Woods, so much."**

 **30th August 2040.**

" **Uhm… Hi Ma? I've never done this ever but this is me. Alex, your son. Mom told me everything about you and I know what you look like. I just wish that I was able to have met you but Mom loved you and she still did. She never married nor even dated since you. You were really the one for her. I'm calling because Mom isn't here anymore and I was thinking that finally she's with you now. I love you and tell Mom I love her too."**

 **1st Jan 2041.**

" **I'm sorry but this phone line is now out of service."**


End file.
